Is Forced Feminization a Normal Part of a FLR?
Forced feminization is when a woman demands that her partner wear feminine style clothing and underwear. She may ask him to wear it underneath his regular clothing or ask him to wear it while doing tasks around the house. She may make him wear makeup or put bows in his hair. She may strip him of his ‘masculine’ hobbies and substitute new ones that align more with her own hobbies and interests.
Why would a woman do this?
On the surface, it seems that a certain type of woman would want to force a man to be more feminine because she enjoys being in control of his actions. She is thrilled by making demands of him that make him uncomfortable and push his limits.
When we examine things a little deeper we will see that no man participates in an activity like this unless it delights him. He’s not really being forced to do it because he wants to do it. He may pretend like it displeases him but it is all an act.
At any given time during a healthy, loving Female Led Relationship, a man may tell a woman that a request she makes is going too far. A healthy, loving Female Led Relationship will never develop to the point where a woman’s requests will intentionally hurt the man she loves. If she truly believes it will hurt him, she would never ask him to do it. She is just as much his protector as he is her protector.
Creating additional challenges to add to the ones that life naturally offers is ridiculous, which means that the act of forcing a man to become feminine:
- Is loving play between a couple
- Means she has a sadistic side that needs to be expressed
- Means she is insecure and needs to exert her power over him forcefully
- Means he really wants to cross dress and is using her as a cover so that he won’t have to take responsibility for his desires
Women who focus on pushing a man’s boundaries, especially through forced feminization, are practicing female domination, which is different from FLRs. Female domination is more about focusing on controlling and attending to the man’s need to be dominated and fulfilled.
In a healthy, loving Female Led Relationship, she is leading him to create her dream life, she is not focused on pushing his boundaries. Femdom is about the man’s needs, Female Led Relationships are about the woman’s desires.
Is forced feminization a normal part of a FLR? No.
Is it necessary for the progress of the relationship? No.
A healthy, loving Female Led Relationship does not need forced feminization to be successful. There is nothing wrong with a man who participates in what society believes are ‘masculine’ activities. You are with a man because you like the balance of masculine and feminine energies, not to recreate him into your own image.
Forced feminization is a kink. It’s something extra you can use to spice up your relationship and make it more exciting and fun. But don’t ever believe that a man who participates in wearing female clothing and cross dressing is doing it because he is being forced. He wants it, probably more than she does.
His wife or partner would know if it would greatly displease him and she would never do anything to bring harm to his life, FLRs are not about that.
FLRs are not about seeing how far a woman can push a man to submit to her will. That is a BDSM femdom activity. It’s actually a lot of fun, but it is still a kink and not a requirement.
We don’t need kinks to participate in FLRs.
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Since my wife started cuckolding me, I have been made to wear lingerie and, on occasions, make-up and ear-rings. Initially, I found this to be totally humiliating and even degrading. I tried to resists but my wife and her lovers insisted and, eventually I began to not only sub,it but also enjoy putting on a pair of lace panties or pulling up sheer thigh-high stockings.
I am now completely under the control of my wife and her lovers.
It is exhilarating, arousing and yet makes me feel so helpless.
You are not participating in anything that you don’t want to be a part of. You are an adult living in a free country. You may pretend like you are being controlled but you are participating willingly. Be honest with yourself. You enjoy everything that is going on. If she were stabbing you in the neck everyday and you hated it, you would leave her. You like this. This is your kink.
Whenever I see the word “normal” being debated, I usually, instinctively roll my eyes and anticipate a needless debate about what normal actually is.
So very nicely said!!!
i am very dominant and am a control freak in my regular life, but can only get off sexually if i am being dominated by a womanly woman. i am attracted to a feminine woman that likes to submit in her daily life, but in the bedroom finds a huge release in dominating me. with that said, i would not want forced fem unless it was only kept in the bedroom because i crave control in my daily life and being forced to be feminine in my daily life would be a loss of control for me so i wouldnt like it. how many others are like this? like very dominant in daily life, but very submissive in bedroom. or for women, very submissive in daily life, but very dominant in the bedroom. i am really looking on finding people that share this idea. is there anyone out there that thinks people are the opposite what they are in their lifestyle, than as what they are in the bedroom? i believe this is how it works for bdsm
Forced fem. and pegging are definitely not normal or healthy.
Very true. Not healthy, And using the word Conquer sicks. I would never allow my wife to conquer me. Just would never happen
But here’s the thing; as a well-trained submissive male and the training is real btw ) it’s almost impossible to say “no”. No, I’ve never been pegged or feminized but if She were to demand such COULD I say no? As a male who believes in matriarchy and obedience to the Woman in authority over me it would be hard. That’s why: be careful who you serve. Now discipline is necessary. The last time I needed correction she ordered me to the bedroom and had a riding crop in one hand and a knotted cat ‘o nine in the other Just 2 mins. was enough to get my mind right. After with tears in my eyes I kissed Her feet and begged to be forgiven. She said it was partially Her fault. “Spare the whip, spoil the husband” is so true. A little discipline and he’ll know his place ( at Her feet-silent or massaging and kissing-awaiting Her next command ) for some time.
I would say no so fast her head would spin like in the exorcist.
Normal is as normal does. My Mistress wife will occasionally have me wear panties under my normal clothes because thinking about it makes HER happy. We have talked about it and no, neither of us has any desire to attempt to turn me into a girly gurl because it is not who I am and it is not what is attractive about me to my Wife. That being said, there are times when she likes to see me in the demure, vulnerable role that a gurl in panties might depict and as such, will instruct me to don panties accordingly.
It’s about what she wants …. yes? You made a great point in an earlier comment …. ” If she were stabbing you in the neck everyday and you hated it, you would leave her. You like this. This is your kink”
Exactly right. We all need to stop worrying about defining what normal is.
For some it can be considered normal. It depends on the individual. But for a “typical” FLR I’d say it’s not normal. It’s either used for kink or for ego deflation.
When I lived in NY I occasionally read Dominant Mystique. I remember one story of a goth Domme in Buffalo who owned a few slaves. She made them all shave all their hair off-except the top of their heads-wear thigh-high stockings, slave collars ( naturally ) and hoods. I have to admit; the level of control was very impressive.
That wasn’t really control. Think about it. If she was stabbing them in the neck each day, they would have left. They were willing participants because that is their kink. No man does anything kinky that he does not overtly/secretly want to do. Everyone involved in control/slave play is just playing out a role- willingly.
Early in our relationship, my wife knew I had a “thing” for soft lingerie. As we grew in our FLR, she suggested I wear feminine panties, to “remind” me of our choice to live this life. At first it seemed like a kink, but, after a dozen years or so of wearing panties that are, frankly, prettier than hers, it’s just part of the wardrobe.
However, when I’m out of town, for example, or changing clothes at the gym, my feminine undies remind me who leads our relationship and my role in it….my willing role. This is especially true when I’ve earned a spanking and she tells me to “lower your panties, dear.”
So, no, I’ve never been forced into wearing lingerie (I love the fall and winter when I’m able to wear a soft camisole under my sweaters!) But it does help me remember I’ve chosen this role in our relationship.
Thanks, Queenie, for your kind guidance!
What do I do I am a sub male but my wife won’t take tha position of dom and run with it she is a very good dom from the few times she did take the reigns what can I do to make her be more dominating I cross dress because o want to be treated like her bitch .I wear makeup stockings garter belt even a lil black dress do my nails even bought me a pair of stellito 6 hills to wear for her and I won’t lie they all combined make me feel sexy as hell but she don’t like it I’m to the point where I will get all dolled up an go to the store an pump gas as a woman it thrills me to show off to others like i might wear regular cloths to dollar store except for t high high stockings and my 6 in hills and just walk around like a woman until I know all in store have seen me and start snickering an laughing that really makes me horney what should I do please help
If she does not like that you cross dress. Find someone else who does. In a Loving FLR, you are supposed to respect what SHE WANTS. If that is too difficult for you, you don’t want a Loving FLR, you want femdom, so pay someone for it.
In extreme forms of level 4 FLRs it can become common in some relationships.
I would never allow any woman ever to do the things i read about in FLR”S. I will never surrender of self respect to anyone especially a woman. i would never ever put on women’s panties or any other under garment. I was not born a woman and will not throw away my dignity for anyone
I completely reject forced feminization because I refuse to consider feminity as humiliation/punishment…it is an honor and privilege to be feminine. It is a wonderful and powerful thing not degrading or weak. Using feminization as a way to provoke submission is paradoxical to all that FLR means.
AMEN!!!
My girlfriend was dominant from the start. I would drive to her place. She would drive. I never knew where we were going.
Third datr, she opened the cat for me and held.ot.
I got in like a female. Backed up say and swung my legs. It was my way of showing I accept her actions.
We had a great discussion. We only had dinner then back to her.place for a talk about FLR.and FLM.
Month later the city a very liberal one. They announcmd in three months there was going to be a Womanless Beauty Pageant.
It gave an address where to pick up an info package and registration.
She drove me there were only two men in lime. Line moved quickly. They handed.a package said due date five weeks.
I saw boys dressed as girls at Halloween. I never thought seriously being. Now I was going to.do it very publicly.
We were give the list how score would be be given.
She no finally asked if she could enter me.
We started going through the info. Three days later she asked me to move in with her.
Just in less than two weeks, I went from dating tooved and being changed into a girl.
We kept a journal. First step feminization. All body removed, toe nails painted. I wore panties, camisole and hose under my work clothes.
We told my mom and her mom. My mom was super be excited. She wanted to know when she could shopping.
The hardest thing was learning to walk in three inch heels. That was the shoes we had to wear.
The only time I wasn’t dressed was when I worked..
I conquered the heels in three weeks. My journal noted. I really enjoyed wearing the casual and.mpre dressy like office by attire..
The moms bought me the be clothes.
The next Saturday we went shopping the four of us went. I wore two inch heels. We also turned in the package. The last item in the package was my female name. My girlfriend I am only child. She wanted a sister named.Nancy.
The day after due date. The newspaper had an article 35 girls entered in Beauty Pageant.
Then .my world crashed. No notice I was told my company closed up three week notice. Six month compensation.
Celeste and no I would start lookinh after the pageant.
Celestel’s boss at the pageant,. I won and her boss offered me a .job.
This was Sunday I needed to call by Thursday. I told him I take it.
He told he be was very liñeral. I could work as Nancy Talk to Celeste,
Celeste told her choice on Tuesday. we went to dinner and she asked Nancy to be her wife
We all ready talked about me taking her name weeks before
Month before the I legally became Nancy. Celeste made all arrangements.
We are happily married. Five years.
Six months before the wedding. I had my name legally changed from Ken tp Kendall. I took her name. Our lease was changed to Mr. and Mrs. Lisa Wilson
She signs Mr. Lisa Wilson and I Mrs. Kendall Wilson.
People were calling me Mrs. Wilson four of before the wedding. These were my choices. We had discussions for weeks. She then in got things done. She works for a lawyer.
I could never disrespect my Family name and Father being Italian I could never show my face to them for doing that. I do have self respect and pride for my family name. I can picture telling my father that I was going to disrespect the family name. I don’t even think i would make it out of there alive
This page was all it took to have my girlfriend remove her request of a FLR. In fact she was so apologetic she even offered me a Male Led Relationship. I respectfully told her we are a partnership. She started to cry (I think tears of joy).