FLR- Reality And Funtasy
Like the kid popping a child’s balloon, we delight to hit those we love with reality. “Come on, get real!” Pop goes their balloon, as we savor that fallen look of resignation on their face. Ah yes, nothing like suddenly hitting someone with a cold bucket of reality. The twisted joy of taking the fun out of fantasy – how utterly delightful!
FLR doctrine seems to hang between these two polarities — fantasy and reality – that are constantly at war with one another. This is called bi-polar thinking. Reality on one hand, and way over on the other end of the spectrum, fantasy. Is that how it is? Sure does seem so. Especially to the submissive trying his best to sustain a viable Female Lead Relationship. It’s his constant struggle — reality warring against his fantasy, constantly popping his balloon.
But is this how it really is? I would argue not. In fact, I would argue that there is no separation between our reality and our fantasy. They are two different particles of the same atom. Furthermore, that what links reality to fantasy is our perspective; and that as our perspective changes, our reality changes to more closely reflect our fantasy; because, in fact, it is out of our fantasy that our perspective arises.
Think of it this way: Dreams are the politically correct way of talking about fantasies. Take the sex out of fantasy, and what is left are dreams. Martin Luther King said he had a dream, not a fantasy. But it is apparent from what we know of his personal life that a few of his dreams were fantasies. Young Michael Phelps told his Mom, he dreamed he would someday win Olympic gold. He probably didn’t tell his mother about the bikini babe putting the medal around his neck. That was his fantasy. In any case, all these dreams/fantasies did alter reality. Because they had dreams, their life, our lives, went a different direction. Dreams have the power to change reality, as do fantasies.
Think of it this way: Reality is made up of protons and neutrons, surrounded by electrons, which form atoms, which joined together make molecules, and everything else. In a like manner, life is made up of realities and fantasies, surrounded by perspectives, which collectively form our existence. It is a universe; meaning one reality, not two.
Motivational speakers love to talk about dreams. Horny husbands love to talk about fantasy. They are talking about the same thing. The energy that motivates us. The energy that vivifies our daily “drearies”. This energy is never wrong; it’s what we do with it that makes it right or wrong. Self-centered kink is just that, ugly selfishness. Other-centered kink is lovely selfless service. The journey of the submissive husband is from heat to heart, from me to we, from crotch to kitchen. She is his guide, his coach, his mentor, his star to navigate by. Don’t pop this balloon, rather enhance it. Don’t separate fantasy from reality, rather take two proton fantasies, combine them with two reality neutrons, encircle them with two perspective electrons, and create the explosive power of nuclear energy.
If you are stupid, you will pop his balloon. If you are smart, you will water his reality with your own perspective. Put your fun into his fantasy. Go for the gold! Be the Mom every little Olympian is looking for.
Suppose Michael’s mother had said, “That’s a stupid waste of time! Get real! You’ll never get to the Olympics!” Now tell me, who is stupid? Popping balloons is a crime against humanity. There is no room in the FLR World for balloon poppers.
In conclusion, think of it like this: FLR couples live upside down in a right side up world. Up for them is down for us, and vice versa. Our good is their bad. Our fun is their folly. Their agony is our ecstasy. Grinding for them is glorious for us. It doesn’t make sense to them, and so they say, “Get real!” Conversely, at this same sign post, we exclaim, “Now you’re really getting it!” It’s just a matter of perspective.