January 2016- Goddess Training Recap
The most recent FLR Training for Women just ended. Each lady walked away with a new treat- GODDESS T-Shirts! This was my first time offering this gift so I was excited to see them wear them during our final LIVE class.
There were three students. Two became Goddesses and one did not. How did that happen?
Well..
With each new FLR coaching program for women, I am excited to see who these women really are. In our private Facebook group we meet for the first time and share stories of our lives in a way that we can’t usually share on Facebook. We’re open. Raw. Hopeful. Afraid.
These ladies don’t know what to expect, but I do. I expect to make them laugh. I expect that they will share some deep truths that they have never shared with their husbands. I expect to challenge them to the point where they are angry. I expect that they will break through a vivid epiphany as I share my brand of unique wisdom with them.
I think of their lives kind of like a cookie.
They come to me to share that their cookie doesn’t taste the way they want it to. I ask them questions about their recipe and they share the secret ingredients. I offer them a new recipe and tell them to try it out to see what kind of cookie they get.
The ingredients I share with them are sometimes contrary to everything they once believed. I use all of the wisdom that brought me from a place of despair and weakness to where I am today, strong, independent, courageous, unstoppable.
But even the best advice isn’t that easy to swallow.
Let’s talk about the ladies for a minute. I won’t keep you in suspense, we’ll start with the one who did not become a Goddess.
She was older than the rest, but just as pretty. She explained that she was having issues with communicating with her husband which is why he suggested the class. She never stood up for herself. She never argued. She never told him what she wanted. She followed his lead. She said she wanted to change that. So I set out to tell her how to get started.
After getting to know her I realized that her main issue wasn’t her husband or her lack of communication. I wouldn’t find out what the real issue was until our final meeting.
The most prevalent issue was that she was an extremely negative person because she had a husband who was the same way. Her energy was so dark that everything she talked about, everything she did, turned out badly or at least from her perspective it was awful.
Everything. She. Did. Said. Lived. Experienced. Thought. Was. Awful.
Everything.
I remember being like that at one point, and I remember how I changed it. I shared that method with her hoping to see some progress. She said she understood it. I read so many wonderful stories that she had written as assignments that clearly explained that she understood and I was elated that she could stand tall, make decisions and make the change for a better perspective of herself and her life.
But by the time came for our final meeting, her private One on One call, she was irritated and frustrated (again) and admitted to me that although she had written assignments that demonstrated that she understood the essence of being a Powerful Goddess, she couldn’t do it.
I paused for a moment to take it in.
Pause.
After 4 weeks of me encouraging, informing, inspiring, educating, giving every piece of wisdom I have gained as a women’s empowerment teacher she says- I can’t do it.
Then I understood.
“You’re submissive,” I said to her, realizing for the first time that dominance or submission has nothing to do with self esteem, it’s an orientation that you don’t get to choose.
“Yes,” she agreed with me. I heard her sigh. “I’m not a Goddess.”
“What is your other option?” I asked her, referring to a note she had written me explaining that she found another FLR teacher who would be better for her.
“Her FLR classes are about giving instructions to the man and making sure he follows them. It’s more about him,” she explained. “You give him 3 rules and you have to make sure he does it or he faces punishment.”
Femdom.
Femdom focuses on controlling the man. A Loving Female Led Relationship focuses on creating and expanding the woman’s happiness. There’s a big difference. She clearly expressed to me that she had no desires or demands for him to fulfill. She just wanted him to be happy.
“That’s a good idea for you,” I assured her. “See, you made the right choice for yourself. How do you feel now?”
“I feel much better,” she said.
I encouraged her to tell her husband that she is submissive so that he can understand that he can’t change her. She can still practice Femdom with him as a submissive but it will remain a shadow of what he’s really looking for.
She was a cutie, hair pulled back in a pony tail, children’s artwork peppering the wall behind her as we all chatted on webcam.
“I’m spoiled,” she bragged.
When I pressed her to elaborate she explained that she didn’t work although she had advanced degrees, her children went to school and she enjoyed a lifestyle of Country Club, pilates, yoga and online shopping.
“He brings me tea in the morning before he goes to work,” she said and grinned. “I couldn’t ask for a better husband.”
Her issue was complex enough to make me have to sit and think for while. She wanted to be more confident in who she is, having been raised to believe that she was supposed to take care of the man, she was having a hard time exercising her authority, the authority he wanted to give her.
So I worked with her on that. I wanted her to understand that his pleasure is his service. If she truly wanted to take care of him she should allow him to please her. And then push the limits a little bit to have a little fun with her newly realized control.
I gave them all exercises, personal challenges to meet. Hers was about her insecurity in “doing” an FLR correctly. Because she so wanted to be right, she was fearful in her execution. My challenge helped her see how she can be more easy on herself in love and in life and I must admit that she did a wonderful job. I was very proud of her for taking a big leap and facing such a huge fear.
After she completed her FLR contract and shared it with the class, I was shocked to read it. She asked for more than what she currently had and with her husband I know she will get it. She became a Goddess when she realized that it’s okay to be selfish and take a big risk in life.
She started the class at the last minute. I am guessing she was indecisive. When she presented herself she did it with confidence that I had not seen in any of the other students in the past. She explained that she was currently in a Female Led Marriage and her husband was magnificent. She was taking the class because she wanted tips on how to take full advantage of the fact that she had such a supportive husband.
He had pledged to do anything for her, but she couldn’t readily identify what she should ask for.
Oh but I know.
After chatting with her for a bit on webcam, I devised a plan for her to a) take over the world b)impact her community c)improve her personal life.
She liked the plan and immediately got busy. She didn’t need motivation. She needed inspiration and that is what she got.
Her FLR is the epitome of what having a Gentleman can do for a woman. Before she was introduced to the concept of a FLR she wasn’t sure of what she wanted out of life, she hadn’t had great relationships and she was doubtful. Because of him she became stronger, she became bolder, she learned how to speak up for herself and to say what she wanted WHEN she wanted it and to say NO when she didn’t like something immediately. She began seeking ways to improve herself and become even more powerful.
That is what a good FLR can do to a woman who has not been previously respected. It can release the inner Goddess. It can awaken every hidden POWER. A good Female Led Relationship will teach a woman that she can impact the world if she wants to.
By the time the course was over I asked if any of them wanted to be open about their FLR and use their real faces, names and voices in a video review. I had never asked this of a group before because I know this is taboo since so many people believe they have to hide their FLRs for fear of repercussions from friends and family. I was curious to see what their responses would be.
Without hesitation she said that she would do it.
And she did.
If you are curious about what it would be like to Become a Goddess in a Female Led Relationship, no need to worry. You will be well cared for, guided and empowered. I promise. By the time you are done with this course you WILL know for sure if you are a Goddess and you will know how to structure and LEAD your relationship.
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